Family and Child Online Safety Blog - SafetyClicks

As parents it is our job to not only teach by saying but more importantly to teach by doing. By that I mean going beyond setting a good example by our everyday behavior. Teach by doing here means getting involved with what your child is doing online.

Our friends at ConnectSafely.org have outlined some great tips for parents who have kids or teens on the social web.

Be reasonable and try to set reasonable expectations. Pulling the plug on your child's favorite social site is like pulling the plug on his or her social life. Instead of being protective, it can shut down communication and send kids "underground" where they're more at risk. It's too easy for them to set up free blogs and profiles from anywhere, including friends' houses or even a cell phone.

Talk with your kids about how they use the services. They, not news reports or even experts, are the ones to consult about their social-Web experience. Help them understand basic safety guidelines, such as protecting their privacy (including passwords), not harassing peers, never talking about sex with people they don't know, avoiding in-person meetings with people they "meet" online, and taking care in what they post - because anything people put online can be grabbed, reworked, and used against them.

With technology changing nearly at the speed of light, non-techie folks may struggle to keep a handle on which gadgets do what. For families who want to protect kids from things that may be inappropriate, the flurry of various technologies can quickly become overwhelming.

Let us take a look at just some of what is out there. This short guide will give you an overview of which gadgets can connect to the Internet and how you, as a parent, can help guide your child's online experience.

Computer: This one is obvious, but I've included it because the vast majority of computers today have the ability to connect to the Internet via a high-speed connection, a wireless connection or, at a minimum, a dial-up connection. This is something to keep in mind, especially if you have a laptop computer that sometimes travels with the kids. If the laptop goes to a friend's house or even to Grandma's, it can likely connect there as well.

If a laptop has wireless capabilities, your house doesn't even necessarily need a wireless access point for a child to get online. It is possible to receive a wireless signal from as far away as 500 yards (potentially even farther). If you don't have wireless in your house, do your neighbors? Is there a business nearby that might advertise a free "wi-fi" connection? If so, the computer may be able to connect to the Internet without your knowledge.

It is a good idea to place the computer that your kids use in a room that is open to the family (i.e. the living room) instead of in a bedroom, and to install parental controls that protect both the PC itself and the e-mail and IM accounts used by your kids.

"IM speak," also called "Internet Slang" or "Netspeak," originally developed as a way for online chatters to convey ideas more quickly by replacing full words and phrases with various forms of shorthand, acronyms and abbreviations, thus cutting down on keystrokes. This "language" continues to evolve and is today used in a number of places -- especially by teens -- where electronic text is used to communicate, such as chatting via Instant Messaging or "texting" via mobile phones.

One common technique is to leave out vowels to shorten words. For example: sorry becomes sry. Here are some other commonly used terms below. This is not an exhaustive list, but these terms rank among the most common. Understanding the basic approaches to word shortening just may help you decipher new and emerging terms as you come across them. Otherwise, try online dictionaries such as the NoSlang Internet Slang Translator or the Internet Abbreviation Dictionary.

:-) : A smile

?: Indicates confusion or the person has a question when posted alone

!: Indicates excitement when posted alone

<3: (shape of a heart) love

2: too or to

4: for

8: ate

A/S/L: Age / Sex / Location \

B: be

BFF: best friends forever

BF: boyfriend

BRB: be right back

BTW: by the way

C: see

CYA: see ya

CYA L8R: see ya later

GF: girlfriend

G2G: got to go

JK: just kidding

LOL: Laughing Out Loud

NM: never mind or not much

OMG: Oh My God

OTW: On The Way

POS: Parents Over Shoulder (generally used in kids' chat rooms to indicate when parents are watching)

R: are

ROFL: Rolling On Floor Laughing

TXT: Text

U: you

UR: you are or your

Y: yes

Blogging, tagging, twittering, friending -- are you familiar with these terms, or like many people, does it sound more like a foreign language to you? Perhaps you've heard other people use them, but you just nod, smile and pretend to "get it" as words such as blogging and tagging just whiz by you. These are all examples of common verbs in Internet parlance that are working their way into every day conversations.

To bring you up to speed on the latest Internet lingo, spend a few minutes here to absorb a few of today's popular terms so that the next time someone (i.e. your own kid) informs you that he is going out to find a hot spot so he can update his blog, you will at least know how to translate it.

Blog: Short for web log, this is an online journal that a user typically updates regularly. The page you are looking at is a blog from AOL about family online safety. There are many personal and professional blogs on almost any topic you can imagine.

Cyberbully: A cyberbully is like the traditional playground bully, but the harassment of his/her victims' takes place online. Harassment can include teasing another person, posting rumors/lies about someone, or publishing unwanted pictures of the targeted person in public forums such as social networking profiles, message boards, chat rooms, etc.. It can include creating a negative profile to impersonate the victim, or e-mailing or instant messaging the victim using "anonymous" user names for the purpose of taunting or stalking the victim.

Facebook: Facebook is a popular and rapidly growing social networking site based on circles or networks. A person selects a network, such as a school or geographic location, and can then make friends with others in that network. Users attempting to join a school network must submit an email address from that school's domain being allowed to join that school's network. Facebook gained tremendous popularity among high schools and colleges, but is now widely used by adults as well.

Friending: "Friending" describes the act of making friends online through sites such as Bebo, MySpace and Facebook. It's easy to make friends on these social networks. You simply send a friend request to someone using the site and ask them to be your friend. Teens often have hundreds of these online friends whom they may or may not know personally. Read "Who Are My Child's Friends" for more information.

• Is it safe to let my teen have a profile in a social networking site?
  It can be. Teens who are careful not to share information they wouldn't want the world to know and who have their profiles visible to people they know in real life, but hidden to others, are less likely to have any unwanted attention.

• What is a social network?
  This term is generally associated with a website where a user can share their name, location and interests in an online profile. A social network connects the profiles of friends together by linking the profiles to those of the friends the user chooses. It is generally safest to link only to someone's profile if you know them in real life.

• How do I keep my information private?
  Privacy is no different online than it is offline. Regarding personal information that you might share in a community or on a profile, the best rule of thumb is if you want to keep something secret, the best way is not to tell anyone. The same is true with information online. Don't put information online that you would not want to share with the world. Even in a "private" profile, friends who can see your profile have the ability to share the information.
  
  Regarding personal information that you might enter to buy something online; only share information that is actually needed to facilitate the purchase and be wary of whom you purchase from. Ask yourself if the place you are about to buy something from is a reputable business. If it is a traditional retail store and you are at their web site, the answer is likely yes. If it is not a business you know, you might consider using PayPal, which is a reputable company, and allows you to purchase something from a vendor, without sharing your credit card information.

• What is a chat room?
  A chat room is an online window that allows users to "talk" to a group of people at once through typing messages into the web page. Generally chat rooms are filled with people who have never met in real life, but are coming together to discuss a topic of common interest.